In some ways, the past is always with us; distant memories you thought you had forgotten pop up every now and then, reminding you that you cannot simply forget the past, and that the past does, whether you like it or not, shape who you are. Sometimes we find ourselves revisiting previous experiences for no apparent reason and perhaps unwillingly. But somehow, these thoughts springboard to the forefront of our minds and remind us that we were not always as we are now; there was a time when we were a very different person having very different experiences. Are we happy with the way that we are now and the way things are now? Or does some part of us wish to go back and be that other person and relive and continue those previous realities?
Category Archives: Uncategorized
Newport, RI & the Gilded Age
0
I just took a trip to Newport, RI, home of many grand mansions from the Gilded Age and my are they beautiful. We toured seven of them in three days. Their initial grandeur, although mesmerizing, loses its effect as you tour the houses and hear the stories of those who lived in them. Realizing what it took to run a house so ostentatious can be disheartening if you don’t belong to the same socio-economic circle. However, they can also be appreciated for their pure architectural beauty and genius. Most of them modeled after castles or chateaus in England and France, they helped spread the culture and intellect of Europe to the U.S. Who would have thought…a small town on the coast of Rhode Island acts as a miniature European city.
For anyone who likes Downtown Abbey or is interested in the social structure during that time, touring these mansions is a real treat. The tours are very informative and interesting, detailing the home-owners’ daily lives, parties, marriages, relationships with their servants, clothing, budget, etc. The kinds of families that lived in these mansions are the likes of the Vanderbilts. In fact, various family members built more than one house in Newport. The mansions are now preserved and shown to the public by the The Preservation Society of Newport County. It’s shocking to think that some of these mansions could have been torn down in the 60s, but thanks for The Preservation Society they are still standing and thriving. I would definitely recommend a visit to Newport, RI to see these stately mansions and learn more about the Gilded Age.
Because
0Because I don’t want to be anyone else.
Because I don’t want to look like anyone else.
Because I don’t want to have a different ethnic heritage than I do.
Because I don’t want to have any other parents than those that I do.
Because I don’t want to have different abilities, mentally or physically.
These are the reasons I am grateful for the way that my life is and don’t wish for it to be any different. Knowing how to be content with the way you are, including circumstances that you can’t change, is not only valuable but also necessary in order to make it in this world.
Fleeting
0Moments, feelings, thoughts are so fleeting that I don’t know how anyone can ever know for certain how they think or feel about something. This is my experience anyway. I may feel something at one point, but it is rarely constant or continuous, so it is really hard to know how I actually feel. Moments – well these are obviously fleeting, although sometimes we can relive them after they have passed. This can be both dangerous, because it’s not good to live in the past at the expense of missing the present, and beautiful, because you can recreate positive memories, like a happy travel experience, with no detrimental consequences. Thoughts likewise come and go, and sometimes they go too soon, leaving you with no chance to fully formulate them cohesively. This can be extremely frustrating, as can fleeting feelings and moments, not to mention heartbreaking at times. I guess this is life though, at least as I experience it. I am curious if other people have similar ailments, as I might call them, because they can sometimes be debilitating, while not physically, certainly emotionally.
Bathroom renovation
0Our little guest bathroom got a makeover! It looks cute now, but it took about a month to complete…much longer than we had anticipated. Here are the before and after pics!
Before
After
To do, or not to do. That is the question…
0Sometimes you just need to embrace the unknown. This is really difficult for me because I am a low-risk person who doesn’t like to do things not knowing what the outcome will be. But this is not a productive way to live one’s life. SO, I have made a bold decision to go to graduate school next year, and although I was so nervous during the decision-making process, I am very happy and relieved to have made the decision, which I believe to be the right one after all. Whew! Once you have overcome the painstaking decision-making process, you can move forward with delight and anticipation, which is exactly what I’m doing!
Guilt
0Do you ever feel guilty about something and not know whether that guilt is justified? What is it that triggers this guilt? Sometimes I feel guilty for the privileges and luxuries that I have when I think about people who don’t have these same things. But what is one supposed to do in this instance? Give up all that one has and offer it to someone else? That may make the guilty feeling go away, but then one is left with nothing and that doesn’t seem to solve the issue; the guilt would be gone, but living with nothing would be miserable. Or is that the point – to make yourself feel miserable in order to empathize with those who have less than you do? I think the quandary of how to compensate for feeling guilty about what you have is complicated and layered. It is not at all transparent how to go about making yourself feel better about it, and even if you do feel better about it, that doesn’t help the people who you felt guilty about in the first place; it only helps you.
Gone
0A whole life, gone.
When a person dies, their whole life goes away, which may not seem very significant because people die all the time and it is a natural part of life, but it is actually a tremendous loss. Say a person lives for 90 years, Â when that person dies, those 90 years go away along with the person. This is a tragic loss, especially if the person lived a rich life and offered a big portion of themselves to other people. Everything that they accomplished during those years goes away, and sometimes, it means the end of a family. Their struggles go away, and sometimes even their culture and their history go away. But what if we try to incorporate that person and the things that were important to them into our lives, and by doing so, feel as though we incorporate ourselves into them? If we do this, we can honor that person and carry on their legacy. Furthermore, we allow that person to stay with us and always remember them.
Lazy
0Sometimes I think I’m lazy because I have such trouble pin-pointing what it is that I want to do in life, and I wonder if part of the problem is that I’m too lazy to really delve deep into one particular thing. The word ‘lazy’ has a negative connotation, but maybe it’s just misunderstood in some contexts. I would say that I am lazy, Â but not because I am not curious to explore different fields, but because I am indecisive about what to explore and uncertain of how to go about doing so. I feel lazy as I struggle to figure out where my passion lies and how to pursue it, which makes me feel badly since being lazy is thought of in such a negative way. But then I have to remember what is causing this ‘laziness’ and attempt to overcome the cause rather than the effect.
Introvert
1Interacting with people can sometimes be exhausting. Trying to be polite, think of things to say, read how the other person is feeling/what they’re thinking, etc. can be very tiring. Sometimes it’s just easier to be alone with your own thoughts and not have to worry about conversation with others. I think this is due to the introvert in me, but I don’t think it is necessarily a bad thing. There is a lot to be said for dedicating time to one’s thoughts because ultimately I think it leads to a better understanding of oneself and, in turn, of the world around us.
gooollysandra 